Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Songs that incite me to Violence

There are certain songs that I cannot listen to ... like

That fuckin punk rocker with flowers in hair piece of crap shite song. I spent a couple of months travelling in Ireland and it was on EVERY fucking radio station over there. I turn on a radio, and it was there. It was like having food poisoning that I couldn’t get rid of. I left to come back home to Australia, and a week later it was playing on the radio stations here. It fuckin followed me home!!! So I was forced to hear it all over again for the next however fuckin long it stayed on the charts here. And I never understood it either and I mean that by never having heard of punks putting flowers in their hair. Safety pins through noses and ears, and Mohawks for hair, but not ever freaking flowers! Who writes this shite? I wanted to shove those fuckin flowers so far down her throat that she would be farting perfume for the next week. *shudder*

Achy breaky heart incited me to violence. It still does. Achy breaky this you cunt! I want to punch you in the head you mullet headed moron.

That fuckin titanic song. I wish to Christ that song would hit an iceberg and lodge itself there so it can be frozen for all of eternity and never defrost! Actually, anything by Celine Dion and Mariah Carey sends me into a rage and makes me want to put my foot through the radio or throw it across a room. Probably best that I stick to my iPod, cos its stuff I like. Mainstream radio sucks dogs’ balls ...

Another I hate is I will always love you sung by Whitney Houston. It sends me into homicidal frenzies. I want to stab sharp things into people to cheer myself up. Why oh why is it a popular song for men to sing to their girlfriends at karaoke? They are usually drunk and their singing sucks. I know that my singing voice is like a bullfrog on heat, but I certainly don’t inflict it on the public. That’s a home job, like masturbation – it’s not polite to do it in public.

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